frog antics

by Bill Tiepelman

Frog Rodeo: Gnome Style

In the heart of the Enchanted Forest, where mushrooms glowed like tiny disco balls and the rivers gurgled with laughter, a gnome named Blimble Puddleflap was preparing for his greatest—and most ridiculous—feat yet: a frog rodeo. Blimble wasn’t known for his practicality or restraint. No, his reputation was built on an endless string of outrageous stunts and pranks that left the forest’s inhabitants either chuckling or plotting revenge. Today’s prank, however, was destined to become legendary. The Plan It all started in the Giggling Lily Tavern the night before, when Blimble overheard a particularly smug chipmunk boasting about his "record-setting" acorn collection. "I could ride a frog across the stream and still gather more acorns than you!" the chipmunk had declared. Blimble, fueled by three mushroom ales and an overabundance of confidence, had leapt onto the table and shouted, "Ride a frog? I’ll ride one so fast it’ll look like a green lightning bolt streaking through the forest!" By morning, the entire forest had heard about Blimble’s bold claim. To back out now would be social suicide. Fortunately, Blimble had a plan. Unfortunately, it was a terrible one. "All right, Ribsy," Blimble said, addressing the enormous, lime-green frog he’d “borrowed” from a lily pad in Tadpole Cove. Ribsy, whose idea of excitement involved sitting very still and occasionally catching a bug, was less than thrilled about the arrangement. “We’re going to make history!” Blimble continued, oblivious to Ribsy’s expression of froggy dread. “I’ll ride you like the wind, and you’ll become the fastest frog this forest has ever seen!” The Ride Begins The clearing by the stream was packed with forest creatures, all eager to witness Blimble’s latest shenanigan. Rabbits, squirrels, and even a few skeptical hedgehogs gathered at the water’s edge. The chipmunk from the tavern was front and center, munching on an acorn and smirking. "This should be good," he muttered. “Ladies and gentle-creatures!” Blimble announced, standing on Ribsy’s back like a pint-sized circus performer. “Prepare to witness the grandest, most daring frog rodeo in history!” Before anyone could respond, Ribsy let out a startled croak as Blimble tugged on the makeshift reins (woven from spider silk, because of course). The frog launched forward with a panicked leap, sending a spray of water across the cheering crowd. “Yeehaw!” Blimble hollered, throwing his arms in the air. “Look at us go, Ribsy! We’re unstoppable!” “Ribbit,” Ribsy croaked, which roughly translated to, “Please let this nightmare end.” The Chaos Unfolds As Ribsy bounded toward the stream, Blimble’s showmanship quickly devolved into chaos. A miscalculated leap sent them careening into a patch of glowing mushrooms, which exploded into a cloud of glittery spores. The crowd erupted in laughter as Blimble emerged from the sparkling haze, clinging to Ribsy’s back with one hand and waving a tiny cowboy hat with the other. “Still going strong!” Blimble shouted, though his grip was slipping and Ribsy looked ready to file a restraining order. Things took a turn for the worse when a dragonfly, apparently offended by the disturbance, decided to join the fray. It swooped down and began dive-bombing Blimble, who swatted at it wildly. “Back off, you oversized mosquito!” he yelled, inadvertently letting go of the reins. Now completely out of control, Ribsy veered toward the stream and leapt with all the grace of a cannonball. They landed in the water with a colossal splash, soaking the front row of spectators and dislodging a nearby family of ducks. Blimble resurfaced moments later, sputtering and still clinging to Ribsy, whose expression now read as “utter resignation.” The Aftermath By the time Ribsy paddled to the far side of the stream, the crowd was in stitches. Even the smug chipmunk was laughing so hard he dropped his acorn. Blimble, dripping wet and covered in glittery mushroom spores, climbed off Ribsy and took a dramatic bow. “Thank you, thank you!” he said, ignoring the fact that Ribsy was already hopping away as fast as his froggy legs could carry him. “And that, my friends, is how you ride a frog like a champion!” The chipmunk approached, still chuckling. “I’ll admit, Puddleflap, that was…impressive. Ridiculous, but impressive.” Blimble grinned. “Ridiculous is my middle name! Well, technically it’s ‘Ezekiel,’ but you get the idea.” The crowd dispersed, still laughing and chattering about the spectacle. Blimble, now alone by the stream, looked around for Ribsy, only to realize the frog had vanished. “Eh, can’t blame him,” Blimble said with a shrug. “I’d probably hop away too.” As he wrung out his hat and started the soggy walk back to his mushroom cottage, Blimble couldn’t help but smile. Sure, he was wet, exhausted, and slightly traumatized by the dragonfly, but he’d done it. He’d turned a ridiculous boast into an even more ridiculous reality—and had the glittery mushroom spores to prove it. “Next time,” he muttered to himself, “I’m riding a squirrel.”    Bring the Fun Home Love the hilarity of Blimble and Ribsy’s wild ride? Bring their whimsical adventure into your life with our exclusive collection of high-quality products featuring this unforgettable scene: Tapestries: Transform your space with the vibrant energy of this whimsical artwork. Wood Prints: Add a rustic touch to your decor while showcasing Blimble’s froggy antics. Puzzles: Relive the fun piece by piece with a challenging and delightful puzzle. Greeting Cards: Share a laugh with friends and family with these charming cards. Start your collection today and let Blimble and Ribsy bring a splash of humor and magic to your life!