by Bill Tiepelman
The Sunrise Sovereign: A Regal Songbird's Realm
In the heart of the most decadent garden imaginable, where the air itself felt perfumed with luxury and the sunlight dripped like molten gold, lived a bird unlike any other. She wasn’t just any bird; no, she was the bird. A vision of sapphire blues, gilded golds, and an attitude sharp enough to cut glass. She perched atop a bough surrounded by blooms so opulent, even the roses looked shy. Her feathers shimmered like jewels, and a delicate crown of blossoms adorned her head, as if nature itself had been styled by a high-end florist. “Another glorious morning, peasants,” she chirped, her voice dripping with sass as she stretched her resplendent wings. The sun, naturally, had risen just for her. At least, that’s how she saw it. “Work it, Ra. Light me up like the celestial queen I am.” Below her, the garden bustled with life. Hummingbirds flitted about like caffeine-fueled interns, their tiny wings a blur of effort. A dragonfly zipped by, pausing momentarily to admire her glow. “You may look, darling, but don’t linger,” she cooed, tossing her head feathers dramatically. “I charge for the full show.” The Daily Drama The Sunrise Sovereign, as she had taken to calling herself, wasn’t interested in mundane bird activities. Worms? Hard pass. Bugs? Gross. Her appetite was far more refined. She preferred feasting on the admiration of her subjects—those tiny, insignificant creatures who dwelled in her garden. “Excuse me,” she called to a passing bee. “Yes, you with the stripes. Could you not land on my flowers? These are curated, darling. Curated.” The bee buzzed in confusion, then flew off. “Honestly,” she muttered to herself, “nature really needs better management.” As the day progressed, the garden grew busier. Birds chattered, bees buzzed, and somewhere in the distance, a squirrel was probably up to something sketchy. The Sovereign watched it all with a mix of disdain and amusement. “Look at them,” she mused. “Scurrying about like life is some big to-do. Meanwhile, I’m up here, exuding effortless fabulousness.” The Hummingbird Incident It wasn’t always easy being the most magnificent creature in the garden. Just yesterday, a particularly ambitious hummingbird had the audacity to challenge her. “I’m fast,” he boasted, zipping around her perch like a tiny, winged tornado. “I bet I can outshine you!” She blinked, unamused. “Sweetheart,” she began, her tone like silk dipped in venom, “you’re adorable, really. But shine? You’re a little sparkle at best. I’m a solar flare.” She extended her wings, catching the sunlight in a dazzling display that sent the poor hummingbird spiraling into a nearby hedge. “Know your place, darling,” she called after him. “And maybe get a stylist.” The Grand Finale As the day wore on, the Sovereign prepared for her favorite part: the golden hour. “The lighting,” she whispered, “is about to be chef’s kiss.” She adjusted her plumage, fluffed her tail feathers, and struck a pose. The entire garden seemed to pause as the sun dipped lower, casting a warm, honeyed glow over everything. “And now,” she announced to no one in particular, “the moment you’ve all been waiting for.” The sunlight hit her just right, igniting her feathers in a blaze of color so brilliant it could make rainbows weep. Birds stopped mid-chirp. Bees froze in mid-flight. Even the skeptical squirrel paused, an acorn slipping from its tiny paws. “You’re welcome,” she said, preening nonchalantly. “Honestly, it’s exhausting being this fabulous. But someone has to do it.” The Legend Lives On As the sun finally dipped below the horizon, the garden began to quiet. The Sunrise Sovereign settled into her perch, satisfied. She had once again dazzled her audience, maintained her throne, and reminded every creature within a five-mile radius of her unrivaled magnificence. “Goodnight, peasants,” she murmured, her voice soft but still dripping with superiority. “May your dreams be half as divine as my reality.” And with that, she tucked her head beneath her wing, her crown of flowers glowing faintly in the moonlight. The garden slept, but the legend of the Sunrise Sovereign lived on, a reminder that sometimes, life’s greatest treasures come with a heavy dose of sass. Ode to the Sunrise Sovereign Oh, behold me, the queen of this golden domain, Perched on my throne, in a bloom-covered frame. Sapphire feathers, a crown of finesse, Who else could serve such celestial excess? Do I wake with the sun? Absolutely, my dear. But not for the worms; they’ve nothing I cheer. I’m here for the drama, the spectacle, the flair, Fluffing my plumage while peasants just stare. Hummingbirds buzz? Oh, how quaint, how small. Like interns they flutter, no power at all. Their wings might be quick, their chatter might thrill, But can they pose like me? I doubt they have skill. These flowers? Custom. This lighting? Divine. I didn’t ask for perfection—it just aligns. Call me extra; I call it profound. Your mediocrity shakes in my glowing surround. And darling, the sun—it rises for me. Its rays gild my feathers with pure majesty. While you sip your latte and scroll on your phone, I bask like a goddess on nature’s own throne. So take notes, my darlings, and learn what you can, From a bird with a sass no mere mortal can span. I rule this realm, with wit and panache, Now flap away, peasants—I’ve sunlight to cash. Bring the Sunrise Sovereign into Your Home Love the regal charm and sass of the Sunrise Sovereign? 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