by Bill Tiepelman
Crisp Leaves and Curious Eyes
There’s something special about the pumpkin patch at night. Sure, it's a wholesome place by day—filled with giggling kids, hayrides, and apple cider—but come dusk, it changes. Maybe it’s the shadows from the jack-o'-lanterns flickering just a bit too long, or the way the wind howls through the cornfields, whispering secrets like it’s in on a joke you don’t quite get. For Evie, it was more than just a patch. It was her escape. An escape from the grown-up nonsense of bills, laundry, and men who couldn’t text back within a 48-hour window. Tonight, though, she was here for one thing: answers. Her straw hat was tipped low over her face, a ridiculous scarecrow get-up she borrowed from the bottom of her attic’s Halloween bin. The patch wasn’t open to the public at this hour, but Evie wasn’t exactly the rule-following type. So, under the guise of “blending in,” she figured scarecrow attire would be just inconspicuous enough. Because who questions a girl holding a black kitten, after all? She didn't name it—cats weren’t her thing—but it showed up one day, eyes glowing like it was auditioning for a Tim Burton movie. The damn thing followed her everywhere now, like a fuzzy, judgmental shadow. "Alright, mystery pumpkin patch," she muttered to herself, kicking a random gourd with the tip of her boot, "what are you hiding?" Evie wasn’t entirely sure why she’d come back. Maybe it was the weird note she’d found stuffed in her grocery bag last week. “Your answers are in the patch. Come alone.” She'd chuckled when she first read it, thinking some loser from the dating app was trying to get creative with his pick-up lines. Or worse, some MLM hun trying to sell her organic pumpkin spice oils. But curiosity got the best of her, as it often did. As she crept deeper into the field, the pumpkins seemed bigger, more sinister. The moonlight danced on the orange skin of each one, giving them a strange, almost human expression. She caught herself staring a little too long at a particularly squat one that looked like it could pass as her high school gym teacher. "You judging me too, Coach Johnson? Yeah, well, screw you. Your crossfit circuit was a joke," she muttered under her breath, glaring at the gourd. The kitten meowed, as if in agreement. Or maybe protest. Who knew with cats? A Rumble in the Patch Suddenly, there was a rustling in the rows of corn nearby. Evie froze, her heart doing that weird skippy thing it always did when she felt like she was about to be caught doing something she shouldn’t. The kitten, on the other hand, seemed utterly unimpressed, licking its paw like the possibility of danger was an afterthought. "Who’s there?" she called, her voice wobbling only slightly. She might be a grown woman, but cornfields at night had a way of bringing out the nine-year-old in anyone. There was no answer, but she could feel eyes on her. And not just pumpkin eyes. Evie tightened her grip on the kitten, which, again, seemed more annoyed than protective. She spun around, her gaze darting from one oversized pumpkin to the next, half expecting one to stand up and start chasing her like a scene from a B-movie horror flick. Then, from behind a particularly large patch of sunflowers, a figure emerged. "Well, well, if it isn’t Little Miss Scarecrow. You really went all out, huh?" The voice was annoyingly familiar. It was Todd. Of course, it was Todd. The only guy she knew who’d break into a pumpkin patch for kicks and who, for some reason, believed showing up unannounced was 'quirky' and not just downright creepy. "Todd? Seriously? The note was from you? What the hell?" Todd smirked, stepping forward into the moonlight, revealing a mismatched pirate costume—complete with an eyepatch that seemed to be slipping off his head at an unfortunate angle. "Yeah, yeah, sorry about the theatrics. But I needed to get your attention. You haven’t been answering my texts." Evie rolled her eyes so hard she was sure they were going to pop out of her skull. "You can’t just lure me to a damn pumpkin patch with some cryptic-ass note, Todd. And your texts? What part of 'we broke up three months ago' didn’t get through to your tiny, pirate-infested brain?" "I thought it was romantic. You know, like an autumn mystery? You like mysteries." "I like mysteries involving crime, Todd, not my ex-boyfriend who can’t let go." The Real Mystery Just as Evie was about to tear into him further—because if Todd deserved anything, it was a proper verbal smackdown—a loud rumble shook the ground. The pumpkins trembled. Even Todd, with all his “I’m just a cool guy” bravado, took a step back. "Uh... did you feel that?" Evie asked, her anger momentarily replaced by actual concern. "Yeah," Todd nodded. "Was that...an earthquake?" "In Ohio? Really? That’s your answer?" Before either of them could come up with a better explanation, the ground started to shift again. This time, it wasn’t just a tremble. Something—something—was pushing its way up through the soil. Evie’s heart leapt into her throat as a giant pumpkin began to rise, roots snapping, dirt flying everywhere. "Okay, WHAT THE ACTUAL—" Todd blurted, eyes wide as dinner plates. The giant pumpkin cracked open, revealing...a man. A man? No, not just any man. He was dressed in a suit, covered in dirt, and holding a clipboard. "Excuse me," the man said, adjusting his tie like this was the most normal thing in the world, "I’m here to conduct the annual Pumpkin Patch Inspection. You two are trespassing." Evie stared, mouth agape, the kitten meowing in confused irritation. "You mean...this is about zoning regulations or something?" she asked, unable to process the absurdity of the moment. "Yes," the inspector said, flipping through his clipboard nonchalantly. "This patch is in violation of several autumnal codes. You’ll need to leave." Evie and Todd exchanged bewildered glances. This night had taken a turn that even Evie, in her wildest mysteries, couldn’t have imagined. "So, uh, no haunted pumpkin conspiracy then?" Evie asked. The inspector sighed. "No. Just poor agricultural planning." With that, the giant pumpkin closed back up, sinking into the ground as if nothing had happened. Evie stood there, utterly baffled, wondering what the hell she just witnessed. "Well," Todd finally muttered, "at least you got your answer." "Shut up, Todd." Bring the Magic of "Crisp Leaves and Curious Eyes" Home If you're as enchanted by the whimsical charm and autumn magic of Evie and her fluffy feline companion as we are, you'll love these unique products featuring the stunning artwork "Crisp Leaves and Curious Eyes" by Bill and Linda Tiepelman. Perfect for adding a touch of autumn to your home or to give as a quirky gift! Autumn Tapestry – Hang a piece of fall magic on your wall with this beautifully detailed tapestry. Wood Print – Bring rustic autumn vibes to your space with this textured wood print. Puzzle – Get cozy on chilly nights while piecing together this fun, detailed autumn puzzle. Tote Bag – Carry a bit of autumn wonder with you wherever you go with this charming tote. Explore the full collection and bring the playful spirit of fall into your world with these delightful pieces!
